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Have Reasonable Expectations from Your Children

By: Dr. Noel Swanson..

Every parent has expectations of their children. These expectations are formed unconsciously from our own wants and desires. They are important. Expectations form the foundation for many things in our lives.

The key is to have positive and reasonable expectations for your children. How do you establish a set of positive child discipline expectations? How do you know if your child discipline expectation is even reasonable? These aren't easy questions to answer.

How do you know if an expectation is reasonable? The first thing to do is research. Does it seem like a lot of work? It just might be. Parenting isn't easy. You make it up as you go along, based on the foundations and parenting advice left to you by others and your own heart to guide you.

When you decide whether an expectation you have for you child is reasonable, you have to be as objective as possible. Look into what the established child behavior guidelines are for your child's age. If the established guideline is that children don't develop full sentence speech till they are at least a year old, expecting a full sentence out of your six-month old isn't a responsible expectation.

Children cannot be compared, and it is one of the most common mistakes parents make when they compare their child with the neighbor’s. If your child happens to be average in studies, try your best to help him improve but learn to accept it. All children are not born to be geniuses. Your child might have some other talent; look for it and develop that instead of harping on grades.

Remember, unreasonable expectations lead to disappointment. You can save yourself a lot of frustration if you keep your expectations reasonable. Unreasonable expectations can damage the self-esteem of the child irreparably. So, be very conscious of what you expect your child do; he may not be able to measure up to some of your expectations.

Once you've established what is reasonable as an expectation in child behavior or child discipline in different areas, formulate a set of goals and hold to them. Make sure to reward your children for meeting those expectations and encourage them to reach more, once they've reached one.

Children thrive on love and praise. Encouraged by rewards they strive to reach higher goals. Never try to impose your desires onto your children. If you couldn’t achieve your goals, don’t re-live your dreams through your children. That only creates negative environment, child behavior problems and child discipline issues. Reasonable expectations promote growth and positive self image and are an essential parenting skill.

You can visit visit http://www.good-child-guide for some good tips on effectively dealing with children's behavior problems.

Article Source: http://www.simplepetcare.com/pet-articles

Dr. Noel Swanson writes frequently for Yes Parenting website and also has a free newsletter on children's behavior problems.
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